“Your child isn鈥檛 revising but you can almost hear the clock ticking down the seconds until their exams. You鈥檙e tearing your hair out,听 sick to death of nagging them to just get on with it. And you鈥檙e worried! Worried that your child is going to do much worse than they should and that “doors” will close due to poor grades.”
Our guest Lucy Parsons is an experienced academic coach and has put together this post, with five strategies to motivate a reluctant reviser so that they start making progress and your stress levels drop.
1. Make sure they know how to revise
An alarming number of students have absolutely no idea how to revise. They鈥檝e heard that you can make , create or draw but they actually don鈥檛 know what to put down on the paper. Maybe they鈥檝e tried, in a half-hearted kind of way, to make a few flashcards, looked at them twice and dismissed them as a strategy that doesn鈥檛 work.
When you nag them to start revising they get all defensive, shout at you and start slamming doors.
The trouble is that they won鈥檛 start revising because they don鈥檛 actually know how to do it. Your first step is to make sure that they know.
My simple process for revision is:
- Understand 鈥� it鈥檚 a great deal harder to memorise something if you don鈥檛 understand it. So, make sure they鈥檝e taken the time to read their class notes, a text book or looked up a YouTube video so that they truly understand what they鈥檙e trying to memorise
- Record 鈥� Once they have their understanding, they then need to record it. This can be as notes, on a mind-map or poster or on flashcards. The important thing is that it鈥檚 an aid to their memory and that it鈥檚 in their own words
- Repeat 鈥� memory is gained through repetition. It鈥檚 the same for all human beings. So, they need to keep going back to the resources they made in step 2 to repeat, repeat, repeat. Twice is not enough.
听2.听Show them how long it is until their exams
Many students will say that it鈥檚 too soon to start revising 鈥� their exams are 鈥榓ges鈥� away. What鈥檚 far more urgent is their Whatsapp or getting on their PS5.
To counteract this, sit down with them and create a plan that shows exactly how much time is left until their exams. If you block out things like school trips, weekends, bank holidays etc and then think about how much they can realistically study in the time left, it should give them a real shock and get them to start expending some effort.
3. Bribe them
In an ideal world you wouldn鈥檛 have to bribe your children. But, exams are looming and you haven鈥檛 got time to waste on idealism.
Short-term bribes tend to work better than long-term bribes. So, instead of promising they can go to that music festival if they get certain grades, tell them they can have an hour watching Netflix if they do 2.5 hours revision this evening, or that if they complete 15 hours of independent study this week you鈥檒l pay for a horse-riding session at the weekend. I call these .
The important thing here is that you never give the reward unless they鈥檝e done what they needed to do to earn it. You need to be 100% consistent and stick to your word.
4. Prove to them that revision is necessary
Some young people think that revision isn鈥檛 for them because they鈥檙e a) too clever and they know everything already or b) they鈥檙e not clever enough and no amount of work will ever make any difference.
With the ones who think they鈥檙e too clever, test them. For example, sit down with a biology text book and quiz them. Or, ask them to reel off 10 quotes from Romeo and Juliet that they could use in an English Literature exam. If they don鈥檛 come up with the goods, you鈥檒l have proven that they need to do some work.
With those who believe that no amount of work will make a difference to their grades get them to do an experiment. So, for example with the get them to focus on learning three over a weekend in a concerted way. They must try. I bet they鈥檒l know them better by the end of the weekend and you鈥檒l have improved their confidence in their ability to revise as well as in their ability to improve.
5. Uncover their big 鈥榳hy鈥�
Some students will say it鈥檚 not worth revising because they don鈥檛 see the point of the exams, anyway. They may not have any clear direction or goal.
In this day and age it鈥檚 hard to pin-point a career and work tirelessly until you achieve it. After all, most of the jobs our young people will end up doing don鈥檛 even exist yet. But, they will have some idea about what they鈥檙e good at, what they鈥檙e interested in and what kind of lifestyle they want to lead.
Start helping them to break this down so that they can see that there is something for them to work towards 鈥� even if it鈥檚 not terribly concrete at the moment. In my experience saying that you have to work hard 鈥榯o get a good job鈥� is simply not enough.
We hope you鈥檝e found these tips helpful. If you鈥檇 like some more advice on helping your child to reach their full academic potential, download my free advice sheet,
Lucy Parsons is an academic coach, author of , and the host of podcast. Visit her website,
